A Music, Life, and Sex Blog about My Immortal Youth
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
I bought my first pack of cigarettes yesterday.
Breakneck speed, low visibility. We turned left from a right hand lane, at the same time that a policeman was going straight from a left hand lane. We almost killed him.
Naturally, he pulled us over (us somehow more at fault than he).
He was shaking when he asked for the license of the vehicle's driver. The driver and the spanish speaker went to witness to him while the PR team went to call home.
We passed by the team in action, witnessing to the cop, and mentioned we were going to get a phone card to call the owner of the car. The cop was smiling by now and playfully told us to bring him a pack of cigarettes while we were at it.
I laughed at his joke.
Not the driver. He looked stern and held my eyes and said, "No, GET HIM A PACK OF CIGARETTES."
I said, "Ohhh."
And so it was that for the first time in my life at the ripe age of 23, I marched up to the counter at the convenience store down the street, leaned over and conspiratorially whispered into the coy lady's ear, "And a pack of cigarettes to go with that, please. Marlboro. Red."
By the time we got back, the Lord and the keys had done the miracle once again and we were free. The reds were the cherry on top of the deal, handed over because they were of no use to us anyway. One less "things I won't do."
Smile, wave, and drive your best as you drive away.
Friday, November 09, 2007
The newspaper cartoonist H.T. Webster once amused himself by sending telegrams to 20 of his acquaintances whom he selected at random. Each message contained just one word: "Congratulations!" As far as Webster knew, not one of his friends had done anything special for which to be complimented. Yet each person was so flattered that he immediately wrote him a letter of thanks. All 20 assumed they had done something worthy of a congratulatory telegram!
(Humility/Pride -- Good Thots)
That sounded like fun. So I randomly selected all of my Yahoo contacts and pasted in a good old mysterious Congratulations to everyone at the same time. And then quickly signed out.
Boy, do we have some humble people in the Family! Here are some responses:
"Ummm U heard what?"
"what was that for?"
"huh??? what u talking about?"
"congratulations for what?...did u send the offline to the wrong person"
"what? am I missing something?"
"you must've popped the wrong person"
"what did i do?"
"what r u going on about?"
"i am puzzled"
"uhh confused! what happened?"
"congratulations on what the heck?"
"what in the world are you talking about??!!!"
"what? huh? congratulations? why?"
...and best of all, this classic:
"Aww thanks!! You're so sweet! You did a great job, too!! Pretty impressive!!"
So I sent around the story blurb, and another Congratulations to each one--for real this time. They had passed the test.
Try it with yours!