Discourse On Unexplained Cerebrally Telesthetic Properties Of Felines And Other Domesticated Organisms
Them: "Beautiful cover! What's on the CD?"
Me: "They're songs to help children learn things like good morals and good hygiene. It's also full of useful and interesting tidbits such as how cats can read our minds..."
Have you ever wondered why it is that scientists can't explain how cats can read our minds? I mean come on--they're scientists! They should be to explain such a simple thing as how cats can read our minds. But no, once again the great scientific method falls before a simple nature fact.
You have to watch out what you're thinking around cats. Whenever you're going to think about something very important, make sure to chase away any cats that are in the room and close the door. Cats can't read our minds through the door. I was washing the windows the other day--while thinking, of course--and all of a sudden I noticed our cat just sitting there beside me. It was obvious to me that he was reading my mind so I threw a raisin at him. It missed. But that was obviously because he blocked it with his mind. Cats can also block things we throw at them with their minds. Scientists can't explain that either.
I wonder if fish can read our minds too? They probably can. Imagine how creepy that would be, all these slimy things just floating around inside their little tank, reading our minds. Fish can probably also read cats' minds. But cats can't read fishes' minds because fish have learned to block the mind reading rays that cats give off. There's a very intricate psychic pecking order--or else how would they control all the mind rays going around out there? It's very simple actually. Just not to scientists.
And also................ no that's about it.
Disclaimer: Content presented in this post not meant to be offensive or disrespectful in any way to Kiddie Viddies or the artists who collaborated on them, simply a humourous and exaggerated look at a colourful past.