Saturday, September 20, 2008

Discourse On Unexplained Cerebrally Telesthetic Properties Of Felines And Other Domesticated Organisms

Them: "Beautiful cover! What's on the CD?"

Me: "They're songs to help children learn things like good morals and good hygiene. It's also full of useful and interesting tidbits such as how cats can read our minds..."

Have you ever wondered why it is that scientists can't explain how cats can read our minds? I mean come on--they're scientists! They should be to explain such a simple thing as how cats can read our minds. But no, once again the great scientific method falls before a simple nature fact.

You have to watch out what you're thinking around cats. Whenever you're going to think about something very important, make sure to chase away any cats that are in the room and close the door. Cats can't read our minds through the door. I was washing the windows the other day--while thinking, of course--and all of a sudden I noticed our cat just sitting there beside me. It was obvious to me that he was reading my mind so I threw a raisin at him. It missed. But that was obviously because he blocked it with his mind. Cats can also block things we throw at them with their minds. Scientists can't explain that either.

I wonder if fish can read our minds too? They probably can. Imagine how creepy that would be, all these slimy things just floating around inside their little tank, reading our minds. Fish can probably also read cats' minds. But cats can't read fishes' minds because fish have learned to block the mind reading rays that cats give off. There's a very intricate psychic pecking order--or else how would they control all the mind rays going around out there? It's very simple actually. Just not to scientists.

And also................ no that's about it.


Disclaimer: Content presented in this post not meant to be offensive or disrespectful in any way to Kiddie Viddies or the artists who collaborated on them, simply a humourous and exaggerated look at a colourful past.



At 6:11 pm, Anonymous mom said...

I dunno about fish but it's so true about cats. Our cat can read my mind, but then I make it very plain what I'm thinking towards the cat. He's not interested in any of my other thoughts.

At 9:32 am, Blogger Lolipop said...

cute. i had a good laugh. (smiles.)

At 4:03 am, Blogger Zephyr said...

aahahahha... gosh you must have been verrrry tired. yes. Very tired. For crying out loud... it sounds like something I woulda wrote!! hhaha

jk. i laughed.

At 5:08 am, Blogger Neo said...

That was hilarious. But I think this already dawned on WS, cause they removed that song from the Kiddie Viddies.

(Or it could have been because numerous parents of 1-5 year olds wrote in that thier kids were terrified of that song.)

At 10:58 am, Anonymous Administrator said...

maybe but check out this mysterious new URL:

....don't ask because i don't know...


At 12:48 am, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey man, Are you ever gonna send me those tracks that needed Mastering? you got my email a while back right?

At 10:30 am, Blogger mClay said...

I hate cats, I don't know if its ok to say that, but I have a very good reason, its cause I like fish.
oh and cats are selfish, also I'm alergic to them. Also(unlike Jesus)cats don't seem to believe love should be a free gift. Why go chasing after a cat when you can have a dog!! unless its a weener dog, don't ever get one of those. Hey I got a good post, do a search on heroic dog stories, then try to find some heroic cat stories...(there are none)
also you know how women are like "men are dogs"!! it's really true, if u can find a guy and raise him from puppy hood, he'll never ask for much an be loyal till the day he or you dies...cute no? Also you can make them sleep at the foot of your bed...keeps the feet warm

At 12:15 pm, Blogger Dogmaeye said...

Nah fish can't read cats minds otherwise it isn't fair if the cat wanted to catch the fish in the pond.

At 10:29 am, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi Joe, could you ask Benji to write me? I would ask him myself but I don't have his email or contact details. my email is Tnx so much! Its kinda urgent .. so if you could tell/write him as soon as you read this. Thanks so much!!

At 12:40 pm, Anonymous Administrator said...

done! let's see when he gets back 2 me........


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